Monday, June 30, 2014

"Keeping Kevin"... (and likely the rest!)

Up for air from four fast birthdays and expecting more...but wanting to catch up..in interest of time, here are a few journal snippets:


A big reason for coming home, was to see Kevin's blessing day:
May the 4th (be with you!)


We arrived early to church, William with us.  William did not want to go to class, so I brought him with me to Relief Society.

Our lesson was the first talk by a sister in the 2014 April general conference about creating a Christ-centered home.

I shared a thought from my mom's Relief Society years ago, when she was to teach about avoiding untoward media  influences.  David Gee had taught her a story from 1 Samuel chapter 5 where the ark of the covenant had been stolen by the enemies of Israel.  As they surrounded the ark with idols, the idols fell down.   Similarly, choosing to build and strengthen the good in our lives can chase away distracting and discouraging influences.

I entered Sunday School a little late.  When I vied to cuddle and rock baby Kevin, he was a little fussy.  


So, I cradled and rocked next to Val and Kevin quieted.  In the chapel,  Maria saved seats.  Grandma Starkey came.  Mom came.  James and Cherie, Daniel, Katie, and Bridger came.  And later, from the front, I could see that Steven, Pamela, Sarah, and Emily planted themselves on the front row of the overflow.  The bishop announced that there were members of the ward that were visiting during a temple maintenance closure for the blessing of a grandson.  He welcomed us back, and invited all who had been asked to help to come to the front.  I worked to focus on hearing, but had trouble with the crying of a baby.
Why did not someone take that baby out?
Then I realized that the baby was Kevin.  Maybe we should let him stay!
After the food and gathering that followed, as we wound down, ready to send Amber and Jake on their way,  each of us shared something that we had learned that year:

Zach told us about something that he had learned reading Harvard's Clay Christensen:  "It is easier to make a decision and follow it 100% of the time than 98%."
Kristen: "I have limits!"







Jake (from Shadrach, Meshach and Abedengo): "Our God will save us..."but if not" we can trust Him--even if things don't end up exactly as we hope.
Amber: "Understanding weaknesses can make them strengths."
                   

This served as prelude to Family Night at Mom's-- relaxed, uplifting.  Following garden corn and potato salad, we adjourned to the living room for a round robin where we fielded interest and questions about our past year.  How nice it is to have people care about specifics!  We wrapped up in time for the children to retire.  Each night, we got to help with part of their nightly routine, which for William (and Savanna) includes pajamas, book time, song time, and then for William, reciting the rules that he needs to observe in order to keep the door open.

A 3.5 year old was quite adamant that I understand the system!
I am impressed with charts and "helps" that each family is implementing to reinforce routine.  Simple and effective.  Talented, organized adults helping young minds and hearts learn boundaries and success.  
(Brianne made this one--close the flap when you finish your work!)
Monday, began a fast, furious week's encounter with 8+ doctor/dentist appointments ranging from eye exams and vaccinations to dental crowns.  Pamela Gee encouraged me to order coronation music from Narnia for my second crown, which I did, so I have had my official coronation!

A disappointment came Wednesday in place of library story time, when it poured from the heavens and from the gutters--a need for excavation and cleaning, which Val explained would take about 45 minutes. Three hours later, we stood drenched outside, freezing fingers fielding floods blocked by foliage.  I really had wanted to spend time with grandchildren, who were napping before we finished.  But, outside, with rain letting up, I put shoulder to the wheel on our front yard.  It seems like the work lasted about three hours and got about one third done.


                            
 (What I learned a few weeks later, is that God's hands--in form of neighbors--can fill in where ours fall short. 
Thank you, Spencer Ward!)

With barely time for a shower, I double checked the names to complement Grandpa and Grandma's sealing.  This can be tricky--Family Tree.org requires proper sequencing and time to research.  Eventually, I confirmed 19 Hillman names just in time to run out the door to a glorious night with brothers, mother, daughter and husband, and aunt and uncle in a beautiful lighted house on a hill where joy spilled from every side.  Our sealer was extremely sensitive and animated each ceremony in a way that I cannot remember experiencing.  He saved Floyd and Bernice's name to the end, and Arlene and Roy knelt in their behalf.  Arlene told the story--how her mother had died when she was three and her little sister, our mom was a year old.  Both daughters were too young to remember their first mom.  After Grandpa remarried and Grandma Laverne battled cancer and died, Bernice came into our family.  
We remembered how Bernice brought a smile to Grandpa's lips as he braved challenges of ill health in his last years, how they traveled the United States in a recreational vehicle, and came to see us.  How they played games, how they loved each other. 
 




Other family names hinted at stories--descendants of our ancestors carried similar names in parallel lines; and soon after, Steven emailed histories of Mayhew Hillman and Sarah King, among those who took part in the gathering at Nauvoo and exodus to the Salt Lake Valley.  Following the session, although I could barely walk straight (functioning on fumes from missing sleep) we drove to a frozen custard place to enjoy time together with Mom, James, and Steven's family.  Sweet is the work!
Thursday, after that second crown, ordering glasses, and collecting items hard to find in another country, I ran, ran, ran, (drove) back as fast as I could to help William plant the garden, which unfortunately, I started by clearing out the back of the house, to make room for more raspberry starts.  But, alas, there was not time for that.  Only time, to dig nine holes and put in pumpkin seeds. William, a good sport, enjoyed counting the seeds and helping me dig.  It was super fun.  My heartache came in not having longer (to put in a real garden.) We rushed to Grandma Starkey's with children in tow for a final family dinner.  Then we slept, packed, weighed, packed and weighed until our coach arrived to drive us to the airport.  It hailed and rained to celebrate our departure.  The wind was blowing, and we could barely get the bags out of the car and to curbside loading, which Val chose.  The skycap was lenient with our copious cargo. 




We got pictures with some airport service dogs that could pray.


Then we sat to collect bearings and weep with the winds outside about missed photo ops with grandchildren we had just kissed goodbye.

Arriving in Arizona, Mark Ohre picked us up in his Tesla electric car.  With no engine under the hood, all six bags fit without a hitch.  Mark was approachable, friendly, and eager to greet us.  We drove to Allina's apartment, toured it, then drove in two cars to a Cuban restaurant.  Allina and Mark tried Dad's suggestion of tostones and fried platanos.









Riley gave us a drawing that he had done.  I was glad that I missed the camera, because we found it under my chair.

On our way to Mark's we saw the charter school that his two boys (Jordan, just older than Riley, and Brandon, just younger) attend.  We also saw Allina's work--a company that installs internet and other wiring connections into newly built homes.  Jordan's bed got tilted for Val with library books (on blended families) and Riley played nine games of ping pong with Grandpa, winning eight.


Riley also proceeded to give Val an introduction to the tablet Val procured to use to teach missionaries in our upcoming mission.

Allina showed me the grand piano and Dad her birthday guitar, then we retired early to prepare for a desert hike the next morning on trails in a reserve near their home. 
After the hike, we ate breakfast sausage, fruit, eggs and we drove to a farmer's market a half hour away.
 
Sampling beet soup and sweet potatoes, we walked around to see things growing-- not too hot; a nice treat.

Upon arriving home, my chosen task was trimming tomatoes in the side yard while checking in with  Mom Gee and remembering Dad.  Val and Riley fixed bikes while Allina went to the store for Riley's birthday party.  Mark Ohre coached Brandon's baseball game in the early afternoon, and returned a little later to meet Mark Steed and his boys, who had driven up from Mesa to join Riley at a clubhouse pool party,


where Riley had invited two friends.  We played Uno and went to bed relatively early and rose to a Mother's Day breakfast at the formal dining table.  It was nice, and Mark and Riley and Val treated us.  Val and I attended an early church meeting
and I met President and Sister Sweeney, who preside over the new (July 2013) Scottsdale Arizona mission, welcoming Bronte Thomas on June 11th.  A doctor spoke and told us that it took 10,000 hours to become an expert at anything, which I figured is about 5 years--he asked how we were doing in becoming experts in the scriptures.  (What I learned today is that there are various ways to say "stand" in Espanol...but not one direct way--President Cazier says I "can't stand" that we can't say "stand!") We also learned about being meek from quotes of Elder Neal A. Maxwell in a classic talk to BYU:

--Serious disciples are not only urged to do good but also to avoid growing weary of doing good   (Galatians 6:, Helaman 10:5--something to be sought after--unwearyingness...if you see any for sale, please advise!)

--They are not only to do many things of worth but are also to focus on the weightier matters, the things of most worth (Matthew 23:23--I wonder if our suitcases would work!)


After our meal, Mark took Val and Riley to the clubhouse to play pool.  Riley played for a few minutes, then Mark talked with Val alone, to speak of future plans.  Val enjoyed their time together, and we were both happy that this had been part of the itinerary.  Allina told me of upcoming vacations to Seattle this summer, possible school changes, and how she felt about combining the families.  She and Mark are thinking things through carefully, and both showed a lot of deference to one another and respect.  Allina drove us to the airport to meet our 2:30 p.m. flight, where we planned to meet Maria in the Seattle airport and Brianne and family were scheduled to pick us up.

All went as planned.  Maria helped with the luggage, and Brianne and Brent brought very verbal and interested children to talk to us the whole way home.  Kaleb wanted to get in the picture every time I tried to take a picture of Zoey.

 And he did pretty well to explain the story line of the new Wizard of Oz movie he had seen with his mom.  Brianne gave us a lovely king sized bed in her office and we woke to a pancake or French toast breakfast before Kaleb left to go to school.  I got to go with Val and Brent to deposit him safely.  Then Maria, Val and I walked with Zoey to the park, where we met a little girl with a mother who had moved there from Serbia.
(Even big kids have fun at the park.)
  When we arrived home, we rested some and did a puzzle and helped prepare to host a family dinner, which April and Tom and Lanae, Patrick and children came too.  

Brianne prepared fresh salmon.  I slept.  The children played outside, and around.  Tom and April brought two cars and escorted us home to Monroe.

Each morning we had a bountiful breakfast with Tom. 
        
Maria and I went with April and the children to their school on Tuesday, while Val and Tom did chores, bought and planted blueberries on Tom's day off.  April brought us to the consignment store, where I was able to find some khaki Capri's that fit.  Val and Tom had made dinner for us, and we ate together.  Each night, Tom and April would play family games with Maria.  Finally, on the second night (Wednesday night) I joined.  We played Apples to Apples--relaxing and fun.  (Maybe it's true--Families who play together stay together!) 
The school--Sky Valley Education Center, a charter school (parent-partnered) welcomes visitors

On Wednesday, we had a date for lunch with Jannette and Kristin.  The dinner was lovely.  I had clam chowder.  Jannette told us about her new job, how it came about, and how she felt blessed to have it, and was prepared for it, though it had been difficult (working the equivalent of two people's jobs in her former position.)  
Kristin shared (and Jannette joined in) about their October 2013 trip to Bali--pleasant, interesting, upbeat, and joyful--the description that we heard of researching and staying in a vacation home rental  included a deep interest  in other cultures, a kind inclusion of people intending to serve them.    
Their words:
"Honey, we just aren't comfortable with you being our 'servants'.  We are going to buy some ice cream here (or dinner there) and we want you to sit here and eat it with us."  They shared their response to the culture, having shrines at every corner and grocery store or market, where people of small means offered large quantities of what they had in personal devotion. 

Thursday and Friday brought more visits to grandchildren...we learned about bike-riding from smart on-line savvy kids! 

Also, I was again able to watch Eleanor and Thomas at school and see little Evelyn show her eating skills.

Val helped with "fix-its", bonded with a busy son, and deposited his Boeing computer safely in an Everett office, thanking kind bosses and colleagues for 33 appreciated years.

A hospital visit Thursday, and Somerset Ward Sunday, gave us some brief time with our friend Walter,  
 and other next door neighbors,
(How'd you like to visit "Better Homes and Gardens" in action?)

along with ward friends, who shared thoughts about reaching out to others as home teachers. The father of a family Val had home taught--shared success with his son's bringing a magic trick to replace the lesson.  My girls camp friend shared about a constant mentor pleading for her teenagers by name, respecting their personal challenges and interests.

Later recounting a pleasant visit with sister Carma and family who drove to meet us from Bellingham, 
 and celebrating a final family night circled by brother and family,
 (We actually missed Anna's arrival to Salt Lake, but enjoyed Eli and need a measuring stick for Grace!)

each visit was brim full--our cup overflows. 
As we watch our families grow, we see that God is good.

Blessings to you each, from south of the border...
  
Next episode:  Convincing Department of Quarantine suitcases jammed with quinoa and lentils are  intended for consumption not cultivation and mounting the last hump for Mission Honduras.

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