March Forth

“Marching Forth”

Dear family and dear friends, 8 March 2009

More than one friend has approached me recently to tell me they are sorry they did not return my email, but they loved getting mine---“Please don’t remove me from your list!” So, maybe I can account for my famine in writing with a recent incident. Well, not so recent, actually. I think it was in late January about when I was due to send another “hello” that I got an indication from a child that something big was coming (and oh, by the way, what if we don’t share it?) Okay. So, Mom, the record keeper, is to write about everything except the elephant in the room. Easy enough…a hiatus from family letters! But now the elephant is exiting its hiding place…a college daughter is sharing her intentions to marry, and we are gearing up to launch—one child from single to married status, one child from high school to college, and the last daughter from junior high to high school, all in just a few months.

The first launch date is set for Thursday, June 25th. Copilot is Zachary [Archie] Archuleta, no relation that we are sure of to David, though they both sing. Location of launching pad is the Logan temple. (Laurene and Val married there nearly sixteen years earlier, Grandpa and Grandma Gee, nearly fifty-one. And Great Grandpa Hillman and Lucille Rowbury were married there close to 75 years ago.) Two days later, on Saturday, June 27th (a day after Laurene and Val celebrate a 16th anniversary and many of us have traveled a day’s worth of mileage points north and west) Kristen wishes to introduce her husband and celebrate their marriage with friends in “Seattle,” which basically means Bellevue. Do keep your ear to the ground, and hopefully we will each hear which way the wedding train is coming and going. A reception nearby to Archie’s family from Sandy, Utah is in the wings for Saturday, July 18th.

Amber has ducked any wedding winds and is steadily “engaged” with finishing her senior year in style, enjoying Hamlet and Hardy, and facing daylight’s savings with a hardy outlook, wondering if Heritage Halls A or B rooms are to be or not to be in her future. I have heard her say that some of her calculus questions are “fun”…but I am actually unsure if it is my aged ears that should be in question. Maria is teaching us from debate about begging the question and results for insufficient evidence as she prepares and recovers from mock trials, adding early morning AP geography reviews to begin her week on top of Sunday March 8th’s springing forward.

My favorite pun of the week happened during Wednesday’s family reading in Alma, when someone read that “they marched forth”—great timing for the day and Amber remembered that it was March 4th all day! Another thing the Starkeys do with scriptures happened last night. When I heard Elder Bednar uses every opportunity to study his scriptures, I put an old seminary Bible in my bathroom—handy for use while combing hair and doing other non-thinking tasks. However, this morning the Bible was missing. I asked Val what he did with it (who else would steal this book?) He didn’t know. I found it on Amber’s pillow in the family history room. Good studying, Amber! But no, it wasn’t Amber. Maria? It must have been removed to help with her Sacrament talk. Well, not exactly. You see, Mom, there were two spiders on Daddy’s office door that needed help into the next world. So, now you know what the Starkey family does with scriptures. (Stamp out evil?) Glad to know the “word” to be more powerful than the “sword;” hopeful it is wielding perceptible benefits to your lives; thinking of you! The Starkeys

Great Expectations with Extra Reaction Time

Great Expectations with Extra Reaction Time
Dear family and dear friends, 18 January 2009

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven…" Opening Ecclesiastes at the break of a new day, I am reminded of the blessing of ebb and flow in our lives. Gratitude and kind feelings to each we heard about and from in a season of giving. In the space between two semesters, maybe it is time to pause to reflect. Week before last we got the intensity of pacing through Dickens' Tale of Two Cities and Great Expectations the same week. Seeing students whirling to the close of their semester, racing through, having a dickens of a time keeping up, Mom read aloud during going to bed rituals, then puzzled about the plot, popping into the middle of things, has checked out both books from the Kaysville library to catch up. I have not gotten to the best of times or the worst of times; however, my expectations of the author are far from diminished. Charles Dickens' has captivating style--he pulls in his readers, shares the depths of his characters' thinking, and wraps things together, connecting unexpected, trivial details to make a coherent whole.

It was fun to see that even President Monson wanted the college students to ponder about Pip. What I am learning from him and his great expectations is that sometimes we chase ships and dreams not likely to make or keep us happy. It is funny how hearth and hard work, as homely as they appear and feel, can offer contentment, fulfillment and joy. Thursday my parents invited me to come with them to visit James and Cherie's family in Draper. A red-haired, eight month old Patrick has come to their home. Aside from a little cold, he seemed pleased with the surroundings, with four year old Katie and first-grade Daniel, eager to entertain each of us with newly acquired chalk boards.

Daniel, teacher at the big chalkboard in his upstairs room queried his four year old pupil, "What is one plus one?" And he chalked his tallies on the green slate. A red-cheeked sincere student peered at the numbers. He wrote them again next to each other, to show more clearly.
"One plus one…Is it eleven?"

It did look like eleven, even to a six year old. So our teacher began again. Notes all over the walls and door reminded me of notes on our doors years ago. Daniels "Ruelsse: No jumping on the bed with shoos!" brought back memories of Amber's bedroom garage sales with various prices and our homemade security system--a sign adamantly scrawled for the front door: "No robbers allowed!"

Our tale of two cities came the day after Christmas, when Archie joined Kristen and our family in a detoured and scenic route to Bellevue, Washington and other parts known and unknown. Archie and Kristen were "wowed" with an elevator up the space needle and ending their evening at Pike Place Market, even if they missed the flying fish. Val was "wowed" with four grandchildren, one who followed him around for hours on end calling either "Gwandpa" or "Bumpaa". Grandpa was constrained to acknowledge that a few of his genes may be passed through to another generation as eighteen-month Ellie, though she has not taken the door knob off with a butter knife at age two like her "Bumpa," she does like to traverse the house turning door locks, and to the stiff "child-lock" rubber bands under the kitchen sink, she simply removes the rubber bands, gets what she needs, then puts them back on. Her cousin Kaleb, a year old, has convinced his parents to allow him to assist with dishwashing. He can proficiently shut the dishwasher on command! And Ellie's little brother, Thomas just watches, appreciating everything. We got to see Riley for a sleepover (the night we arrived.) Riley was hoping it could be a campout like a year ago July. With the record snows that dumped just before our visit, April deferred. Riley, on the phone now, updating his Grandpa with what has happened in the weeks since, assured him that next time that Grandpa leaves, he is not to leave Riley's present with anyone else: "Don't let this happen two years in a row!

What was the present? It was something from the Jepson era, where people can talk to each other and see them. A lady in my mom's neighborhood speaks with parents in the Philippines daily at little or no cost. So, we are practicing how to connect—have tried it with Tom, April and baby Thomas, and hope to accustom Ellie before we try special features allowing alien eyes and Roman noses.

Maria is getting to be the family computer expert, having just taken a computer class, practicing Office 2007. Our favorite funny happened recently, as returning from our 1800 mile journey, unpacking and purging to begin a new year fresh, Maria announced the day before the rough draft for her largest term project was due, that a paper containing her experiment data with hours and hours of sampling was nowhere to be found (not in the nine loads of trash or recycle dutifully marched into the yard, nor in her locker, nor anywhere in the stack of her school materials.) A fast email was dashed to the teacher: "The Dog Ate My Homework—but We Have No Dog!" and the teacher forgave the rough draft, with two remaining days to present the final product—which came at the expense of a night's sleep for one student, and a couple of parents passing batons, also patient friends and family members willing to pump a pretend gas pedal, distracted by cell phone chatting. Reaction time, she discovered, is significantly slowed. We were thinking to involve her sleep-expert brother on testing slowed reaction times of missed slumber…but are happy for some catch-up time over term break, and Maria is gladdened to receive a cash prize, as science fair judges valued her project and its presentation as one of the third places. Maria has talked about using the prize to fund her own cell phone.

Finally, we are grateful to benefit from talents of kind friends. Driving back from Seattle, all the passes in Washington were closed. We have recently received an email with a link to see the devastation on the same roads resulting from the melted snow. As we drove south through Portland, to make our way, our neighbor friend and weather man advised us to keep driving through the night to miss another storm brewing. All night we drove, and home we came! Archie and Kristen helped firm up the second leg; Amber, recovering from wisdom teeth extraction helped drive, and we welcomed the extra help. Chaining up at Snoqualmie has never been easier. It pays to have friends! As we begin a New Year and term with great expectations, aren't we blessed that we can depend on one another; that we can watch our rising generation with interest and awe, and work together to love and learn in the balance! May this month bring fulfillment of your grandest expectations, and may your reaction time be sufficient. Blessing to you! The Starkeys